This is Poppy speaking! I would like you to know that I have rules, standards and stuff that needs to be obeyed. But my #1 rule is...
ALWAYS BE SNEAKY!
If you are not sneaky...then life is a miserable wasteland of un-sneaky people. In order to be sneaky...I have a set of guidelines that will help you achieve worldy sneakiness.
#1: Be Adorable. This comes natural to me, as I have huge eyes and very nice little facial expressions that make it impossible to ignore my innocence (accept when you happen to be a annoying mommy with too many rules...like DON'T PEE ON PEOPLE and NO RUNNING UNDER THE BED and DON'T STEAL YOUR SISTERS FOOD!)
#2: Be in Charge. If you can't maintain a strong leadership position...you are in no state to sneak around and be awesome.
#3: Blame it on your sister. If discovered in your acts of devious epicness...go the the standard back-up explanation and BLAME IT ON FERN!
#4: Aquire Henchmen. If you have others to execute your evil plans...then if they are caught...it will seem like it's them doing the naughty thing...not you.
#5: Have a Big Brain. If you don't have one...then I'm sorry to say you can't be a devious evil sneaky rat (or dog, human, cat, horse, alien, other small creature.)
#6: Act Fautless. I am already faultless...it isn't an act. But if you don't have my great fortune...just wing it.
#7: Obey Me. I always know what to do. Listen to me or else.
Thank you for reading! I'm so glad I could be of help to your evil schemes.
Poppy the Devious Genius Rat
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